Survey says: More sex toys in the bedroom…

Come hither...

Come hither…

Fifty Shades of Grey: Love it or hate it, but you can’t ignore the phenomenon. Earlier this year, the iVillage 2013 Married Sex Survey set out to see the E.L. James trilogy’s impact on the sex lives of married couples.

While only 20% of respondents had read the books, 65% of those reported changes that included more sex, more sexy lingerie, more foreplay, and more talk about fantasies and desires. (Yay — we’re pro all of those things!) We were especially pleased to see nearly 40% report bringing more sex toys into the bedroom.

There are a multitude of good uses for sex toys. Undeniably, some of the best involve just you and your toy…but some other pretty fabulous ones add a partner to the mix. We know some still view toys as relationship threats, but the iVillage findings offer a bit of evidence that the tide is shifting. (It’s a trend we see everyday in anecdotal feedback from our customers and in sales data that shows growing numbers of people buying our products for their partners.)

We’ll keep cheering on this shift–and doing whatever we can to support it. (After all, some of the original inspiration for Crave was a friend’s impassioned account of how a sex toy transformed her sex life.)

Pretty sure this won’t be the last time we have something to say about Fifty Shades, but for now, cheers to sex toys in partnership with partners!

Read more about sex toys in the bedroom:

Find complete results of the iVillage 2013 Married Sex Survey

See what 20,000+ readers have to say about Fifty Shades of Grey


  1. Tovally Awesome on November 22, 2013 at 6:15 pm

    Nice, brief and informative. Good to recognize where trepidations are and highlight that shift through not just anecdotal feedback but also sales data.
    Things definitely are shifting, I see it everyday with my customers and their return rate to our store in getting more "adventurous" in their purchases.

  2. Angel on November 24, 2013 at 8:18 am

    I don’t know about fifty shades being the door opener, and I wouldn’t condone it as an accurate and true reflection of the world it tries to represent, but it is encouraging to see people taking a healthier view on sex. But I still think and believe there is much more at play than a one (poorly written and mis-informative) book that’s changing attitudes about sex.

  3. Jennifer on December 3, 2013 at 8:19 pm

    Angel — Totally agree that there are many factors at play… Part of what I find interesting about the “Fifty Shades” phenomenon is that for a lot of people, it’s been both cause and opportunity to acknowledge, explore, discuss (and even embrace!) interests and desires that previously they may not have recognized or been comfortable admitting. For that reason, I think it’s fair to say that “Fifty Shades” has helped propel and illuminate some of the shifting attitudes we see, but like you, I definitely wouldn’t give it all the credit. Are there any specific contributors you would point to? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

  4. Jennifer on December 3, 2013 at 8:19 pm

    Thanks for sharing your perspective…we love hearing first-hand accounts of what’s happening “out in the field,” so to speak!

  5. Angel on December 10, 2013 at 7:33 pm

    I think one of the key contributing factors is the shame that has been associated with sex is slowly becoming a thing of the past. Discussion about sex be it on the political or social level has allowed for people to consider sex in a different light. This isn’t to say we don’t have a long way left to go but, it certainly has made people more comfortable with exploring their sexuality on more than one level. It has also made it possible for sexual literature to evolve beyond the over romanticized, steamy and cheesy paperbacks of yesteryear. Outside of the literature world and back into the world of sex toys, I think a company like Crave has also made it possible to look at sex toys as being elegant and sophisticated; helping people be more comfortable with bringing these toys into the bedroom. I think the physical appearance of the sex toys makes them less intimidating and less intrusive to both parties concerned, and more exciting. So atmosphere and options I feel have made it easier for people to say, there is no shame in exploring what one likes within the legal and ethical (not social) boundaries.

  6. on January 8, 2014 at 8:18 pm

    Angel — I appreciate your thoughtfulness on this topic and agree with you on all points. From my perspective, it seems like sophisticated, well-made sex toys are having more luck than sophisticated, well-made sexual content (literature, films, etc.) in terms of gaining broader awareness, distribution and consumption, but I hope we’ll start seeing content gain more ground soon….

    We’d love to use Cravings to help spread the word about some of the great content out there. If there’s anything you think we should know about, please feel free to send recommendations our way. (You can always use the contact form at if you prefer to contact us privately.) Thank you for engaging on this!

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