We are delighted to continue our International Masturbation Month celebration with Shannon Boodram, author, tv host, and sexologist. Stay tuned for more interviews with women we love throughout the month.
Who inspires you and why?
In life, my family. They are perfect people. Who really gets to say that? In career: Esther Perel and Dan Savage. I literally have never heard one single thing from these people I do not agree with. And I love their delivery. Ya know there’s a Google talk with Esther and Dan – clearly I exploded after watching it so now I am typing to you in tiny parts.
We love the way women are becoming empowered around sexual pleasure. What’s your favorite example, story, or anecdote about this?
Is it corny to use your own anecdote? Never mind, this question actually goes perfect with what I am about to say: I own it \*/ they love it! It’s my mantra I created because as women I feel too often we deny ourselves of pleasure in fear it will offend or disrupt others. But what if you could magically give yourself permission to be your own creator and as a creator, to know that all that comes from within is GOOD and worthy of this world. If you own it, they will love it – don’t second guess that. So now let’s get to the good part: what do you want? How do you want it? Go on tell us we are dying to hear how to serve you queen!
What do you wish someone had told you when you were starting to think and learn about sex?
Hey, see this part right here? Yea? Well that’s your clitoris, it’s the shit. Here’s some coconut oil go into the bathroom and see for yourself… Man that would have saved me from a lot of bad, self-loathing sex.
What do you think has changed the most since you first started working on ideas about women’s sex and pleasure?
My definition for what is “right” or good sex. I frustrate people with my lack of opinion sometimes – does it work for you? Does it truly work for the people you involve yourself with? Well then awesome, it’s good! When I went to school in San Francisco they made us watch all of these unconventional pornographies and documentaries to try to broaden our tolerance. I try to keep this training up. Currently I am reading Everything You Know about Sex is Wrong by Russ Kick. I read one story about a man who had a passion for fisting…I was like okay cool I can deal. The next story was about cutting and the author describes sucking blood off of her partner’s penis and how thrilling it was. I stopped reading the story with the excuse “well this just isn’t for me.” But I am a sexologist, how dare I think it’s about me! So I went back and finished the story, by the end I was like, okay I get it a little more – good for you girl.
What are the best parts or biggest challenges of your own journey as a sex-positive creator?
There are so many bests I have started and deleted this sentence so many times: more orgasms, unapologetic pleasure, teaching, inspiring, helping, discovering, advancing, meeting fellow educators – number one though has to be changing people’s minds about sex being a taboo topic.
Worst or most annoying part? People constantly assume I am having sex with whomever is in a 100 mile radius of me. If I pop up in a video with someone on my YouTube channel top comment without fail: you can just tell they’ve had sex… like no. Let’s not get sexual educator and sex worker confused, kids.