As a heterosexual couple (a bisexual woman and a privately kinky man), having non-penetrative sex feels subversive sometimes. I love masturbating in front of him and performing with sex toys. Sometimes I will beg for his fingers to fill me up because I want that feeling, but I usually need a little more direct stimulation to get off. And no matter how amazing my orgasms can be, I want him to come too.Read More
We think about sex a lot around here, and we watch and read and talk about it. Most of what we see depicted is some sort of fantasy world where everyone is hot, everyone is aroused, everyone is adventurous, and everyone is satisfied, fully, all of the time. And we know that’s not exactly reality.…Read More
The idea of going to a strip club together started as a sort of joke when we had a few hours to kill. I think we both knew it was a potentially disastrous idea, especially considering the lack of alcohol at nude bars, but eventually we just went for it.Read More
With the eyes of the world on Kim Kardashian’s “Break the Internet” magazine cover, and all things ass-related becoming a bit less taboo, we wanted to share a personal story about trying anal sex.
The first time I tried it was after my high school boyfriend’s good friends (a couple) raved about how great it was, how they did it all the time, especially if she was on her period. We did it in my basement, bent over a hideous, orange 70s couch. I can’t remember if my parents were home upstairs, but I seriously hope not.Read More
Like any person who subscribes to monogamy, I had to give up a few things—and people—when I got coupled up. But as a bisexual woman, I also had to give up whole parts of myself, not because my husband expected it, but because I expect it of myself. And, frankly, I wanted to. No one’s every thrilled me like he does, and now I’m just not interested in sharing my intimate self with anyone else.Read More
Early on in my relationship, the “have you been tested lately/can we stop using these stupid condoms already” talk naturally led to the subject of past partners, specifically how many. This made me nervous being that I was an early bloomer and had a feeling my Catholic-raised boyfriend had gotten started a little later in life.Read More
I know he’s drunk when he starts reading me poetry. John Koethe, Wisława Szymborska. From there it’s only a skip to Hegel or Proust — poetry through prose and philosophy, he says — and my eyes glaze over. They cling to the periphery, admiring the smoke coming from his nostrils as he exhales.Read More
My boyfriend would probably call me an exhibitionist as he’s always telling me to stop walking around naked in daylight with the blinds half open.
“What if somebody sees?” he says.
“So what if they do?” I say.Read More
I have a complicated history with sex. I’ve engaged in it, have sought it out, and have talked about it at length with friends, but my relationship with it is shaky. I wish I could say I was like Samantha Jones, and had sex “like a man”. I even wish I could say I thought of sex as being very special, and only worth sharing with those you love. I wish I knew where I even stood on the matter.Read More
When my boyfriend and I were living 50 miles apart for two years and operating on a weekend-only schedule, we were each involved in a separate weekday relationship: Me with my vibrator; he with his hand and the girls in the porn he downloaded off the Internet.Read More
At 46 I traded my healthy uterus, ovaries and cervix for a one-way ticket to Menopause Land. Why? I have the BRCA2 genetic mutation, which means I am at high risk for developing breast and ovarian cancer. The BRCA mutations were discovered in the late 1990s. They got a lot of press when actress Angelina Jolie tested positive for BRCA1 a couple of years ago and then published an article about her decision to have a radical mastectomy. While that option is available to me, I chose to have a total hysterectomy, which also significantly reduces one’s risk. The surgery coincided with my foray into running, so I was in excellent shape and was fortunate enough to recover quickly.Read More
It’s sad to say, but even the most sexually superb relationships can come to an end. So I recently learned when the physical distance between myself (in Berlin) and a lover (in Oslo) became too great of an obstacle to overcome, despite the overwhelming excellence of our bedroom adventures. With that decision made, we had one more thing to sort out: who gets custody of the sex toys?Read More
The photographs were exquisite – bare, sensuous curves, outlined in a mellow, candlelight glow. These portraits were of women I knew, staff at the local women’s fitness studio I faithfully attended as I worked to get my mommy figure back into shape, and shot by a local professional photographer who was inspired to try his adept hand at nude portraiture. I was intrigued.Read More
My husband has had an interesting relationship to vibrators. He’s an engineer, so whenever I bought a new vibe, he’d turn it over in his hands, eyeball the seams, and poke at the parts. Then he’d carefully watch my face while I used it, wanting to see how that particular gadget translated into results. He approached a vibrator like a scientist does a hypothesis.Read More
Fifty Shades of Grey: Love it or hate it, but you can’t ignore the phenomenon. Earlier this year, the iVillage 2013 Married Sex Survey set out to see the E.L. James trilogy’s impact on the sex lives of married couples.Read More